Strippers and Sacred Space

I used to be completely ashamed that I had spent 8 years of my life as an exotic dancer. The negative stigma it carried was something I allowed to control my self esteem and worth. I had allowed thoughts to pervade my mind such as, strippers are dirty. Strippers are drug addicts. Strippers have daddy issues. We’ve all heard them. Actually they’re true for the most part. I won’t deny that. However, as I’ve grown spiritually I’ve learned a truth I must have been ready for. Every single time I stepped foot onto a stage, I stepped into my sacred space. I loved being on stage and in the center of attention. I loved the dance. The sensual movements, caressing my body, crawling and sliding across the floors. When I stood on the stage, in my eyes, I owned it. I owned the entire room. My fire would ignite and I felt my power. I learned my body on the stage. I learned how to entice men and women alike. I learned to control the mind with my eyes while on the stage. I learned to read the energy of every person in the room and would know through that energy who would create the most profit for me while dancing on the stage. I learned to accept and relax into whatever positions my body would naturally flow into on the stage which created acceptance and compete surrender sexually with many men and women in relationships I had through the years. The stage was my sacred space before I even understood what I was doing. I used to perceive those days as the darkest times of my life. Little did I know that I was simply creating a space to truly understand who I Am.

I think of when I would sit and watch the other dancers on the stage. I would see many of them with the same euphoria that I would carry. That full surrender.

I’ll never see a strip club in the same light. I’ll never feel the same about myself either. I used to carry shame and now I carry empowerment.

Dancing on a stage. Bare. Free. I am a beautiful, sexual, wild woman. I was a stripper for 8 years and I LOVE that. I embrace my sexuality. I love myself.

I still crave the stage. I understand that craving is my doorway to even more understanding and truth. I won’t be making a return to the club stage, but I feel a calling from deep within. I feel the energy stirring. I’m looking forward to where this journey leads.

I spent some time with a friend just a few weeks before this revelation. I met up with a friend who I know from working at the club’s. We both talked about a new club in town and in disgust we both said we didn’t want to hang out in any bar at all because the energy is too negative. I’m looking forward to sharing my new thoughts with her.

Much Love my friends!


Reiki Experience Follow up Seeing Death 

I posted a few days back about doing a reiki session on my father in law, but having to stop because I saw a bright white light and felt as if I would pass out. I had even tried starting again after a short break and decided it best to begin again the next day. 

I had also posted right after that I had come home from work to my neighbor being dead. It turned out to be the teenage girls mother had hung herself and had been dead since the night I had to quit the session because I had saw the white light. 

She happened to pass away around midnight….

I was giving the session after 11pm. 

When I first made this realization, I attempted to rationalize and assume I was “thinking wrong”. I checked my post to see if everything matched up and sure enough,  it did.  My husband even went through and asked like 5 questions in an attempt to rationalize himself. Sure enough,  it happened. 

What is so strange is that I actually only spoke to the woman one time. I’m not sure why I had this experience, but just days before my best friend’s aunt passed away from a car wreck while I was on the phone with a medium who described EXACTLY her aunt as being next to me. I had never even met this woman. 

I’m sure the purpose and meaning of all of this will come together soon enough,  until then I’ll just keep documenting!!

Much Love

Death all around

Well,  my family just showed up to our home in a culdasac to our neighbor dead on the garage floor. Unsure of if the mom is alive or dead. 3 hysterical children.

Feeling overwhelmed by DEATH. 

  • Sister died Oct 5 2016
  • Husbands close friend Dec 6 2016
  • Husbands uncle May 24 2017

One of my best friends lost her aunt like figure just a few days ago. As I pulled in my edition to see the police everywhere,  my stepmoms best friend went into high risk surgery for cancer. 

I’m really unsure what all of this death could mean,  I’d hardly experienced death before my sister left this earth plane. Now,  it seems to be the norm. 

I’ve read in the past that death is a common thing during spiritual awakening. Guess I can see why, however not feeling it. 

Strange Reiki Experience 

Last night I was giving my Father-in-law a Reiki session and I had such an extreme experience that I had to stop for the night with the plan to try again today. 

Prior to this experience, I do not feel I’ve had any “out of the ordinary” experiences while performing or receiving Reiki. 

I started off the session as usual,  lit an inscent, put on some mediation music. He laid on my brand new massage table we had been waiting to try out since we spent Father’s day weekend in Michigan for a race.  Everything was going as expected. 

I placed my hands over his face and eyes after invocing the symbols and saying a prayer. Within a short amount of time with my hands placed in this position, I could hear light language channeling in my mind. I held my hands there and could see light flowing through my crown,  down through my feet,  and through my center and straight through the crown of my Father-in-law(Pops, for future reference). It was the brightest light I had ever envisioned and as this was happening my chin seemed to be lifted towards the sky. It felt as if a clearing in my throat was taking place.  As my head lowered, my hands moved to his temple region on the sides of his head. I heard the words in my mind, “The sacred breath”. My body began to vibrate and I could hear some type of tone ringing through my being.  I saw a white light brighter than anything I had ever seen flash before me and in an instant I felt my body begin to lose control.  I guided myself to the couch that sits beside where we had the bed sat up. I informed him I would need a second, my entire body had become clammy and I felt that I would pass out. When I felt I could go on,  I placed my hands back in position but almost immediately the same feeling came over me and I ran to the door and into my livingroom because I felt hot. 

I decided in this moment that I would end the session and start again tomorrow.  

Pops was concerned that he should have felt something but I encouraged him that wasn’t the case and that I just needed to rest. 

I’ll see how things go for today. 

Love and Light to ALL.

Speaking Light Language 

My journey with speaking light language has been quick and intense. Then again, that’s my norm. I’ll give a little backstory…

My sister passed away in October from an overdose.  Our birthdays are a year and less than 2 weeks apart. Mine was March 3rd, hers the 15th. Our childhood was filled with trauma and abuse resulting in wild lifestyles in early adulthood. Her passing caused an immediate spiritual awakening that encouraged my interest in Reiki as well as becoming enrolled at University of Metaphysical Sciences.  I am unsure of why exactly I’ve been drawn to do these things,  but I seem to have a knowing that I have to.

After being attuned to Reiki master I began channeling light language through my hands.  I then had it channeling through my tongue on the roof of my mouth(I’ve never heard of this anywhere else). Almost immediately after it began channeling through my voice and writing, it sometimes comes out in chants, or songs. My voice often changes and I’ve had loud almost tribal sounding voice come booming out of me that I couldn’t replicate at a later time. 

I’ve probably spent hours and hours researching others who speak light language,  I’ve tried figuring out what to do with this gift. I suppose that will come to me as it should. I’ve began to realize that I must release my ego and fear of judgement to be able to realize my soul path completely. 

I plan to use this page as a place to record my experiences for my own records and so others can use it as reference just as I’ve used others experience to help me. 

So far,  I’ve only been speaking light language a few weeks. I’ve uploaded one video to YouTube and recorded a few others after getting that advice from a local metaphysical shop worker. I plan to continue recording whenever I feel the urge.

Love and Light friends!! 

My YouTube channel is